If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else

**I started writing this post yesterday afternoon, which was Wednesday and it WAS cloudy. Update on the weather, and happy to announce, sun IS out! hallelujah!***

Hey all! I hope you are all having a wonderful Wednesday (technically Thursday) afternoon. Where I’m at, the sun is trying to find its way out of these clouds that seem to really love sticking around. Clouds, I’m happy you love each and everyone of us and want to just keep lingering around but with all do respect, we need some distancing. Sun – if you keep not coming out, well, you are grounded! Your punishment is you HAVE to stay out for the next 30 days. And I mean it! If only it were that easy or sane to talk to a planet. In all seriousness, some good weather, some light throughout your house, some shine during your morning, afternoon, evening walks, and/or drives, I do believe it helps lift spirits. Vitamin D, you are our best friend right now. Be a sport and work with us, okay?! OKAY.

I wanted to go about talking about a quote that I have heard, and speaks to me. It might speak to you as well. I chose this quote for many reasons which I will go into later- Don’t get TOO excited! 😉

“If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.” – Booker T. Washington.



Just a little about him. He was born into slavery. As we all know, slavery was a time of hardship, it was cruel, demeaning, it was wrong on every single possible level, and it still blows my mind that people were put through these horrendous acts. However, this man was very intelligent. He made lemonade out of lemons. He was considered the most influential black leader of his time which was 1856-1915. He put himself through his own schooling, and from there become an educator after the civil war. His main teaching points were self-help, racial solidarity, and accommodation. He was a full believer in hard work and he himself had exceptional work ethic.

“If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.” I want to talk about how this particular quote could mean for our society right now, a month from now, and 10 years from now. Here we go!

Our society is facing a pandemic. It is forcing people to stay at home and avoid large gatherings – anything that involves a head count over 10 is a no go. Let’s get real, the only people that need to have gatherings of 10 at this moment, are doctors, nurses, scientists, and some other important reasons. I won’t go into what I consider important, because, it most likely has no significance to what your opinion might be. Putting out the fire before the fire even started! Bada bing, bada boom!

If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.” This quote was one I chose because it doesn’t solely speak to those going through severe hardship (Like some are currently). These words could mean, if you’re walking down the street and see someone, say hello. Give a friendly wave. You made their day possibly, and through that simple, really SIMPLE, act of kindness you made your day as well. If you see someone who might look distressed – flash a smile. They might be longing for that bright facial expression if they may have only seen darker ones. Parents or caregivers that might be dealing with a toddler that is screaming, kicking, and fighting for someone to buy that pack of skittles. (We have all witnessed it, if you haven’t, it wasn’t because of the skittles, it was the m&m’s 😉 ). Make a joke, let them know they aren’t alone, offer to buy (without the child hearing cause well then, if the answer is no on the adult end, you need a time out- No matter how old you are). Try your very best to not act annoyed. It’s not what they need at that time. As you could imagine, they are embarrassed and deep down are highly aggravated and wondering what they ever did to this child to act like a monster (that they love, obviously). Those are day to day examples of how this quote applies. Let’s move on to now, and what we can do to not only lift ourselves up, but others, too.

During this time, most people are scared, nervous, uncertain, jobless, helpless, hopeless, some are sick and wanting answers that simply can not be answered with 100 percent accuracy. To all those, I say, lift up. To the people that are scared, show your support for them. Talk to them even if you yourself are JUST as scared and nervous, give them your attention. Sometimes talking through something that is tragic is better than any medicine out there. We all are anxious during this exact time. By knowing you might have just knocked out a panic attack for someone, pat yourself on the back. Job well done and you should feel pretty dang good about that. Jobless, helpless, and hopeless may fall into the same category but might not for some. What I say to the people that are jobless right as we speak (or as I am typing), it isn’t forever. You will get back on your feet. During this time, look at some skills you had that maybe you overlooked. You might find yourself in a whole different career. We are self learning. You may not know it now, but maybe 3 months from now, you might be thinking to yourself, “how did I ever work there, how did I ever do that” Positive thinking goes a long way! If you have the means, or 20 dollars to spare, go ahead and give it. This could buy a meal for a family, could go towards some sort of bill they are putting off or maybe need that last little bit of money to pay it fully. Give it to your local church, or place of worship. Once you do those sorts of things, you are HELPING, and you are not only making yourself a better human, you are lifting yourself up. My main point of all of this, is that, it feels GOOD to do good and to be good. It feels amazing to know that you MADE someone’s day or even week. If you can do it even once a day or week- do it. Especially when even the strongest need some lifting up. Let’s keep on eye on each other, you might just find that paying a little more attention to those around you makes your heart bigger and better. We need each other! Lets be each other’s cheerleaders (yes you men as well, men are cheerleaders too.) What is there to lose? NOTHING! We are all winning if we follow those wise words of Booker T. Washington.

10 years from now? It’s hard to predict. But, if we do these small little acts of kindness, we are going to carry it on to our neighbors, our families, our co-workers, our children, and… THAT would be a happily ever after, in my book.

As always, stay safe, stay healthy, be kind and lift up someone AND yourself!

Much love,

Abby

Can’t Sleep, Here I am… Again.

Alright so, hello again. Good morning! Let’s try to be positive at the fact that I am up at 1:02 in the morning due to the fact that well, I can’t sleep. I watched some I love Lucy which is by far the best feel good show of all time and has been my favorite thing to watch since I was little. If you are feeling like you need a laugh, tune in. Watch it. I promise you will laugh. But anyways, that was nice and fun. I read a little on my kindle. I closed my eyes. Shortly after tossing and turning I gently nudged my snoring husband a few times to make it stop. It did, for a few lovely minutes. Not long enough for me to go to lala land of course. After those few shenanigans, it led to some swift kicks, and still, he laid there snoring and in a really great sleep. (must be nice! Proud of you hubs 🙄!), I tried counting sheep, I don’t remember what number I got to when I called it quits and finally said this is for the birds. That got me to thinking, what if I counted other animals? I kid you not, I went through animals that are peaceful and hopefully would put me to sleep. Needless to say, if sheep can not do the trick, bunnies can’t either. That led to me finally realizing I was going crazy and to get out of bed. So I did. Which led me here. You are welcome. I’m kidding- obviously anyone that is normal is sleeping and has no use for reading this. Maybe tomorrow?? 😉

I think what I have mainly been having a hard time with is anxiety. Which effects my sleep. I personally struggle with anxiety even when times are normal! In times like these, it has gone to a whole other level. I’m talking to many different people and have come to find out, a lot are struggling with your their own mind during this time. I’m here for you! I get it through and through. I got to thinking that perhaps it is the fact that my days aren’t that busy as of now. Both physically and mentally. I know that I am not the only one- It is weird being able to text someone at 12:30 am on a random Tuesday and know you’ll get a response cause they’re up with you. It’s a good feeling but also a feeling that gives you what I am feeling now, which is a deep longing to go back to the “real world”. That literally can mean so many things for so many different people. My real world, during the week is to be a Karen and in bed by 10. Wake up at 6:15 and work until 4:30 or so. The day that happens, I’m really not sure if I will hate the noise of my alarm clock. Hearing that noise also means I get to see people, family, I get to go back to my life. So, the beep beep beep might just be music to my ears.

Disclaimer alert – my alarm that I wake up to doesn’t beep. It plays some instruments that I really don’t know how to describe, spell, even sound out. It’s nice and some might even say catchy if you listen to it at 10 in the morning, or whatever time that doesn’t wake you up. But beep beep beep is what we are going with! Moving on.

OKAY! This blog is supposed to be light and fun! I want people to relate to whatever I am rambling on about. To the people that are having sleepless nights, due to whatever fact, HANG IN THERE! Counting cute animals probably won’t help and wish I could help you out in that department but, I tried, and well no it doesn’t work. If it does for you, I’m impressed and also I want to know the animal your counting cause well, I went through a ton. But I will say, having an outlet of something that during times like these can make you laugh, smile, take your mind of off things… even just for a little, is amazing. It works wonders. Some stuff I CAN recommend for sleeping/relaxing is sleepy time tea. It does the trick and I swear by it. If you are familiar with Trader Joe’s, go. Go now. Well, maybe not now seeing as they are closed but when they open tomorrow, go! They probably sell it elsewhere too. Eye masks! Put them in the freezer all day, pop those suckers on and boom, dream time. Lavender oil. Highly recommend! The smell is amazing, and has very positive effects as far as sleep/relaxation goes. Dogs. Okay, maybe this is way out there but there have been studies that do show that sleeping with your dogs in your bed does help your sleep. When I can’t sleep, I look at one of my fur babies at the end of the bed (or in most cases, on top of my head) that are lost in the wonderfulness of sleeping and sometimes, that just helps me. AND knowing they have no cares in the world. Weird? Maybe. But whatever can put that mind to rest, I say, do it.

Alright so as we talk about all this sleep it is currently 2:12. I am tired. As I’m talking about all these ideas, I might just go to practicing them and hope to get some shut eye. I won’t be counting any sort of animals, but maybe put an eye mask on, maybe put some lavender on my temples OR maybe just try to rest my thoughts and put them to bed as well. To anyone that is loosing sleep due to these times hopefully some of my ideas can help you out but, I got you! We all have each other. Let me know if there is any certain tricks you all might have up your sleeve in some comments below. Goodnight, and sweet dreams. As always, much love.

Love,

Abby

Let’s Talk About FOOD


Good afternoon and hello! Hope you all are staying healthy, positive, and staying sane 😉 If there is one thing that my blog can possibly offer you, it is minutes of doing SOMETHING. My sister this morning sent me a link that helps your body mentally and physically, and it last for three minutes. What exactly is it? It is laying on your back with your legs against the wall. Easy enough. It is said to help blood flow to your core, ease stress, help you sleep, calms your nerves, relives swollen ankles, relives headaches, and improves digestion and for that, I am ALL here for it! For the benefits, of course, but also for the three minutes that take up my in home order days- yes, yes, and yes! I’m making jokes about this, not about what is currently going on in our world and what is surrounding us but making light of what we are being *temporarily* put up against. I realize that being told to stay at home, is absolutely nothing in the big picture. We could be ordered to do a whole lot worse. In just my opinion, we need to laugh. Especially during times like these when that is all that is left to do, and all that will keep us going. So with that said, no matter what the position you are currently in, and I know everyone is a different place in all of this, I think AND hope we can agree to take a happy dose of laughter, and own it!

Moving on to what has my heart and also what I said this certain blog was about… before I got side tracked. FOOD! Food I think is one of the most comforting things that is out there. For me, it brings back childhood memories, it holds traditions, it has religious values, and goes from generation to generation. It makes you feel good even when you may already be feeling good- Yes food is that powerful. I personally have always loved cooking starting around the age of 17. My first memory of making a dinner was a complete and full on DISASTER. I think my family could agree on that, although they all said it was “good” (bless their hearts)( Also, sorry, 13 years later.) Basically I was following a recipe that was online. It was a garlic Italian pasta dish. Garlic was the main highlight of it. So here I am, reading and seeing three bulbs of garlic. I had JUST started cooking. I did not know a bulb from a head which looking back, silly, SILLY, Abby. So, I asked my sister, Maggie, to help me peel all three garlic heads (again, supposed to be bulbs). She did. She even questioned if this was right, imagining how can all of this garlic possibly go into one dish. I vaguely remember her even asking “are you sure we need all this garlic?” She trusted me and if she didn’t (I’m almost positive she did not) , it was all out of love for her little sister who was trying to figure this cooking journey out and letting me take the lead. I did not realize bulbs and heads were different. As you can only imagine, we had three heads of garlic, not tiny bulbs like they had recommended, in our family dinner. It was awful. Insanely awful! Not one person in my family complained. They took bites. I even got compliments which, if you know my family, even if it is down right disgusting, they will give you props. They probably either went to bed really hungry, or had some food later. Years down the road, we still laugh about that. My mom always said she just wanted to support my interest in cooking and for that I am grateful. In the comments below, what is some of your first time cooking memories? I would love to hear about them!

Sunday night dinners, Saturday afternoon cookouts have always been a thing. In my family our Sunday dinners consist of typically, some sort of pasta (nope, not my 17 year old version of pasta), bread, meatballs, salad, and a dessert (or multiple if I’m being honest) In my earlier blog post, I said I can not wait for those gatherings to continue on. It will! I cant wait! Right now, my mouth is watering for my moms meatballs. Out of this world. BBQ’s and cookouts, cheeseburgers, hot dogs, brats, ribs, the list goes on. When you think about getting together, food is at the center of it. If you’re hosting, the question will always be “what can I bring?” Its the foundation of parties and or just small get togethers.

Who has ever heard of the 7 fishes? That is what my family does on Christmas eve. Granted it IS hard to get all of those fish dishes cooked to your exact liking, we manage and it is delicious! We do a pasta dish as well for those that do not care for fish, or simply want both- don’t blame ya! Aside from my family, there is so many traditions that many families have and I would love to hear about them. There is so much to learn through people, some traditions might just stick with someone that is reading this or YOUR comments.

On the topic of food, food is so versatile! Add ingredients or seasonings to recipes, take them out, make your own creation, follow a different idea. On that note, starting this Sunday I will make public my menu plan from Monday- Thursday. I’ll let you know what I’m making each day, along with the recipe link that you can follow. If it is something that I have my own recipe to, I will give instructions on here how to prepare and cook. I will provide you with a full grocery list. I encourage you to change it up! Monday maybe you aren’t feeling like grilled fish (for example), do something that maybe was meant for another day. Eliminate stuff you do not prefer, OR try something new. The worst? You don’t care for it and that is okay in my book. I encourage everyone reading this and if following this, leave comments. If there is anything that I could talk about, throw it out there. Tell me some of your BEST and WORST food experiences. Whether it was in your home, in a restaurant, in a different state, or even country let me know! If you have pictures, makes it all the better! I hope you keep cooking through this, keep making those awful mistakes and ruining dinners, turning back around and making the most fork or spoon licking meals, and enjoying the process as it goes. With all my love and foodie love,

Abby

I do

Let’s talk about fun stuff! We deserve it!

Let’s talk about marriage. It is two people that are giving themselves to each other. Saying “I do”. It means I am giving my life to you. I promise to be faithful. Sickness and in health. Those that aren’t married already might be saying “what?! How?!” I will say, I understand. Gosh when I was single and was around people that were married I thought, well, that is the end and you all are silly and doomed. Little did I know, my world changed for the best when I got married. For those that are engaged, thinking about marriage, please , do not be afraid! 🙂  Being married over a little 6 months I have learned a lot. Let’s break this down. Little by little here we go!

You learn to love the person you thought you already did love. When sleeping habits, eating habits, everyday life habits start kicking in you might think to yourself, WHAT?! Panic sets it. You have legal marriage papers. You are thinking what the heck did I get myself into?! Until you realize, this man or this woman is your number one. 

Marriage is hard. No one said it is easy or will be easy. But coming from someone who is married, it’s FUN!! If you found the person you are meant to be with, you have got it made. Guaranteed you will have fights and disagreements. You will be okay.

My message to anyone to those engaged couples during these times- stay positive. Your wedding will happen!

My message to anyone that is married- stay sane 😉 But realize you are so lucky to have each other and you  will be okay.

My message to older couples- you are going to be just fine. I promise.

Love,

Abby

The Journey Begins

“And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”

― Sylvia Plath

Hey there! I’m Abby and I am under stay at home orders due to Covid-19. I am 30 years old. I want to put out the most positive we can get from this, but before we get to that there needs to be a few things said.  I feel deeply sad for anyone going through the virus,people that are scared, people that are suffering from mental health during this. I am one of those people that fall into that category. I am feeling sad for people that can not get help due to the lack of supplies we currently have,people without jobs or fears for their future, people that do not have health insurance, and loved ones that can not see each other through this social distancing. I know I am missing a lot of others but just know, because I am not mentioning it, does not mean you have not crossed my mind. THANK YOU to all of our healthcare workers, a million times, thank you. You all are superheros in every sense of that meaning. From putting in long hours, to helping the sick, to risking your own health for the sake of us. Your work will never go unnoticed. 

For the people out there that are struggling to find hope or happiness during this time, know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It may be hard to believe at times, but there will be. We are all in this together and we WILL get through this. I know that we hear that all the time, but you have to believe it. We will get through this. Say it 100 times over if you have to.

Let’s get to the positives that we can take from this! Enough of this mushy stuff 😉

1) We have the most advanced technology. We have doctors, nurses, scientists and many more that are currently on this. When I say this, I mean they are attacking it. Will continue to attack it even when we go back to our day to day lives. 

2) During this time,we get the chance to be at home with the people we love. Home is our sanctuary. Children that can no longer attend school, are able to be with their mom and dad, sisters and or brothers. As a person that works in childcare I can say that a lot of children are scared, confused, and do not know what to make of any of this. Although it may be a burden for some families and I empathize for those, we are together. At the end of the day, a normal day, a really good day, or a horrible day, who do you want to see and talk to the most? Your family. Although it may be hard to see some light in this, remember, they are your world.

3) Staying home is a great way to get those tasks done that when you’re working full time, you can’t do or put off. Lets get those done! Paint job, laundry that is just piling up (my current situation), reorganizing, redecorating, gardening, deep cleaning, the list can go on and on. When this is all over, you might just WANT to stay at your very impressive home! 😉 

4) We are learning how to be creative! We are cooking, we are using our minds on how to stay active. We are learning to do things that we should have known a long time ago.

There are probably a million more positives that I can come up with but those are for now, helping me, and I hope it helps anyone reading. 

What I personally have taken from this is many things. Good and bad. I don’t know one person that can be 100 percent positive, and if there is, I would LOVE to meet you!! (or talk, seeing as, well…  self distincancing) 

The good- I am much more appreciative of things I once took for granted. I can not wait for the day when my whole family can gather and not talk through doors. I will hug each and every one of them and say those three words that some have a hard time with and that is, “I love you”. The day will come, and I am anxiously awaiting it. 

The good- Spending time with your partner. You learn more and more about them when locked in with them non stop (no this is fully not positive for anyone that is married, but we’re together through the good and the bad, right?!) You lean on your husband, or your wife, for support and comfort. During this time, more and more of that is being shown. You realize why you chose to spend the rest of your life with that certain someone. 

The good- The color blue makes me happy hence this font color is blue. Most of my house is blue, but you find out very quickly what makes you happy and or what has made you happy but you overlooked it because life happened. It is the smallest of things. Blue! I have found out that I really love writing. You find out more about yourself when you are alone with your thoughts and when the world is not in the palm of your hands. 

The good- Our furry friends who are just LOVING their parents being home. We are making their days. That alone should put a least a little smile on your face. 

The bad- which I can probably say in one paragraph. 

We are scared. We are wanting this to go away and have no exact time to tell when this will be over. We wish we did. Jobs are being taken away, and people are getting sick. There is no getting around that. There is no sugar coating either. There is nothing I can say to make that positive. The only thing that I can say is that to everyone, we will see the light. There is good and bad in everything in life. I trust we will prevail. Stay safe. Stay healthy. Stay home. 

The next time you see your family and friends in person, in a normal gathering, hug them hard. This virus has shown us what losing someone could look like. Say encouraging words, be kind, be fair, be thoughtful, be understanding, be loving, and most of all be you. Be you in all senses and love each other for being themselves. This virus will NOT take over us. Prayers and thoughts go to each and everyone. So much love.

Love,

Abby